Morbidity: Dead end

What is the best time to have critical experiences? None, right?

It had been a really hectic month. Professional pressures and unfavourable events really take a toll on your health. 

About a month ago, I had my first encounter with low blood pressure. That too at the time when I was driving activa back to home. I, suddenly, started to feel like fainting out of nowhere. Concentrating on one object was troublesome. I thought it will go away, instead, it rose with passing kilometres. Then, it dawned that not only am I risking my own life but of the others on the road as well. 

So, I stopped on the roadside and felt like calling dad to pick me up. To get some relief, I closed my eyes, but it still felt uneasy; removed helmet to get the burden off my brain, literally but not symbolically. Then got my mask down to be able to breathe in more oxygen. Somehow, I got a little bit of control back and within minutes I was able to concentrate again.

Source: iStock

I'm not sure if it was due to the professionally stressful events that I had been recounting on my way back home, or hunger, or maybe the excessive exposure to computer screen because it was a day of meeting statutory deadlines, or whatsoever.

Another time, a fan fell on me. Not literally, but quite actually. I mean it was not the heavy part of the fan that fell on me but I guess it's wings. I was working in my office. Suddenly something hit me hard. In my head, I was thinking, "What has hit me so hard?" But you have to acknowledge my panic-less (or say not so human) reaction. I didn't let out even a scream, so silent was I. I turned back on listening to the reaction of my colleague to realise that a fan has fallen upon me. 

With the grace of God, it was nothing serious. But the kind officer of mine took me to the hospital, where the doctors ruled out any complication. However, I was asked to report if any dizziness occurred. And you must be knowing that psychological thing wherein you start to feel some things even when they are not. I felt almost dizzy and hence had to undergo a CT scan which ended up with a 'normal' report.

In my school times also, I would occasionally feel an unusually fast heartbeat, making my vision blank for 4 - 5 seconds. It used to be so fast that if I sat still I could feel my hands shaking with the rhythm of the heart. After a minute or so, it would slow down to such an extent that at times I would wonder if my heart would be able to take the next beat. I remember this whole thing happened once when I was crossing the road. Imagine going blank in the midst of the road. "Whoa! Stuntwoman," someone may say. Thankfully, this one has stopped occurring now. 

Remember, my 'The accident' post. After that accident, I had one side of my jaw completely swollen but without any external injury. 

"There is internal bleeding due to the sudden force," the doctors informed. They made me undergo a 3D scan of my face to diagnose any dental fracture. And I found another moment to be grateful to God for there wasn't any in the report. 

I used to joke around, "Look, how strong my skin is. It didn't tear apart even on facing a major blow." Another joke used to be, "My candy is not dissolving. I've been eating it for days."

It took me more than 2 weeks to be able to completely open my mouth as you do to eat golgappas. The eye jaw opening came out as a Diwali gift for me that year.

May we all keep on getting such gifts of life.

Edit: I forgot to mention another dreadful experience. It was last year when I got vaccinated against Covid-19 with the first dose. I was amongst the first ones in my farthest circle who was above 18 to get it. I thought the rush would only increase afterwards, then why not now?

Unaware of the impact on youngsters, I got it. Within 20 minutes I started to feel mild headache and dizziness. 

But what to say about midnight. Whilst in my sleep, I couldn't feel like moving my arm freely. The pain level was so high that I had to literally pick it up and place it wherever I wanted it to be. Thankfully, I've never experienced a fracture but I believe it was no less than that. However, the worse was yet to come.

In the early morning, I didn't know if it was fever, pain, nausea, or diarrhoea that was causing the uneasiness. I gathered myself to vomit. Nothing happened. I laid back. I visited the loo. Nothing happened. Plus, I didn't have the stamina to sit for a long time. I laid back. I went out again with all possible comforts to vomit it out. 

Suddenly, I felt that I couldn't bend my fingers. They were straight up; a sensational vibration ran through my veins. Just like current passes through wires. I had to put in considerable effort to fold my hands in. 

I could hear my family getting worried about the side effects of the vaccine and I regretted getting it so early on. I should've waited for its reaction on others. 

That whole day, the fever was so high, that I didn't feel well even in my sleep, lying and sleeping all day long with null physical activity. In fact, going to the table for having a meal was also troublesome. Leave alone being able to have a proper diet. I remember it had taken almost a week for the arm pain to subside completely.

Given the rising level of cases, I mustered the courage to get the second shot after months. This time I was fully prepared to have another day of life ruined. With the grace of god, I did well the second time.